I have finally made up my mind. I will take that risk of exploring the unknown and the world of the unemployed. I know that my future may not be as bright as it should be when I was younger  but this time around I know I am ready to get out. I have been having a lot of misgivings about my work, for one thing the lackluster way I go about it day in and day out. There was no more drive in me. All the things that I do have become mechanical. There was no longer any love put into it. I tried to go and take a lot of time off, maybe I needed a different scene. But it did not work.  My restlessness grew until I began to drag myself to work. I cried each night on my way to work. I hated it. I was depressed and fought it off with more than 12 hours of sleep during weekends. I was tired and moodier than usual. I thought maybe if I go back  to school I will get my groove back. But three sems later, the restlessness continued, the tears flowed and the depression lingered.

I took a long hard look at the career path I lead and when the client told us he would be leaving the company he dearly loved, I knew it was time for me to do the same. I needed to go and find my drive anew. My agents, my babies the past year have grown dear to me  but they have all toddled on to reach the top. My work is done, I managed to make them top performers and regardless of the lousy KPI I get monthly, i know that I have done my best not only for my team but the entire campaign as well.

I know I would not have become who I am today without this company. I was promoted here and earned notoriety of sorts. I became more social, more adventurous and more patient. It taught me to be critical, analytical and pick my fights. I have a lot to be thankful for. Yet like any relationships, it finally reached a plateau. I became more aware of its faults thus I became very impatient of my own growth. I see unworthy people being promoted, I see lazybums all over, I keep noticing the lack of malasakit of the powers that be towards their employees, even if having malasakit is one of the core values being touted. I got tired of the politics. There were a lot of cowering fools ready to kiss ass. I pity those who worked hard but never got anywhere because they kept their mouths away from those asses. I was slowly falling out of love and becoming ungrateful to this apple green infinity organization. That is not who I am, so before I continue with my downward spiral, I tendered my resignation and nipped the growing dark side of me in the bud.

It has been 7 and a half years ago when I first set eyes in the world of the immortals. I have survived storms, floods, bomb threats and a killer psycho former boyfriend. It was not an easy decision to make. I already marked my territory here. But it is not enough anymore. I wanted out so come the 15th of this month, I will say goodbye to Garnet now Pasig site because it finally dawned on me that it has stopped being my comfort zone years ago.


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